Each month we highlight a Māmā in our community to be our "Māmā of The Month", and for the month of May we are featuring pediatrician and Mama, Dr. Anik Cockroft.
She discusses what it's like going from two keiki to three, and delves into navigating postpartum mental health as a mother with a newborn. Read on to hear Dr. Anik's beautiful words of wisdom from managing multiples to navigating the journey after welcoming a new bundle of joy into the world!
Dr. Anik Cockroft
Aloha, I’m Anik! I’m here embracing the messy magical as a Mama to 3 wild groms, Pediatrician to the keiki, and embracing my Author Era — stoked to release my first children’s book called Oceans of Aloha into the wild. It’s a rad adventure around the Islands to find the true source of Aloha.
We live in a Hale overflowing with colorful chaos here in Kihei, Maui — my husband JD + I, our 3 C’s and our FURst baby, our husky boy Kai Kai (Kaileo) whose fur occupies every corner of our Hale and hearts. We’ll probably make you a shave ice if you come over— we even brought it to our recent photos for the Rainbow Shave Ice print! Before living in Maui, we delighted in living in the shadow of Diamond Head on O’ahu for 4.5 years while I completed Pediatric Residency training at Kapi’olani and a Sports Medicine Fellowship at UH Mānoa.
Our 3 miracles of Aloha are:
Camden Makaia (Age 7)
Cruz Kekoa (Age 4)
Chord Nalu (10 months)
Transitioning from two keiki to three
We named our daughter, Chord Nalu for “musical wave” and truly she is our 3rd note in harmony! We have chosen to wait until the birth for all 3 of my hāpai seasons, and for us, it has been such a sacred surrender to meet and greet whoever has been growing and destined for our ‘ohana all along.
The transition from 2 to 3 has been fascinating! I stressed about planning childcare for them while we were having Chord at Kapi’olani, and we had extended ‘ohana show up for us in the most glorious way. We are now 3 car seats across the back, and commanding some serious space in a grocery shopping cart! Bedtimes and sleep have been…. Interesting…. And riding the waves of what this has looked like and the knowing that this is a short season to be suspended in has made me lean into how special this gets to be. I’m choosing to move and nourish myself in ways that empower me as a Mama, and allow me to hold space for myself and for the other Mothers surrounding me.
As referenced in the beginning of our talk story session, we embrace the messy-magical- colorful-chaos, and honestly, this is pretty much the core RSVP into delighting in parenthood, right?! I’ve found that infusing humor whenever possible, checking in with each other even in the symphony of cries and constant interruptions has helped us remain anchored in our connection. Communicating clearly so the unseen mental labor of Motherhood doesn’t become too overwhelming has been something I’ve had to choose to pivot into. I love doing all the things for our ‘ohana. Our ‘ohana also functions best when I protect my own peace and prioritize my health.
Carving out time for self care as health care — whether to move my body, journal, take an epic nap, or go float in liquid aloha has been uplifting. The habit of choosing myself in these moments is a muscle I’ve had to take time to intentionally and consistently strengthen.
With each labor and delivery experience and diving deeper into Motherhood, I feel increasingly purposeful, peaceful, creative and stepping confidently into my power. I’m also trusting my Mamatuition (I’ve blogged about my thoughts on our Mother’s Intuition for the Co-community ).
Something I wasn’t anticipating as much that has been so expansive is to have a front row view to witnessing the shifting sibling constellation and how much they adore her, engage with her and are enchanted with her!
Postpartum Mental Health
Another aspect of this season as we transitioned to having our keiki outnumber us is that I was super intentional about staying suspended in the sacred time of the newborn bubble. I actively pursued and made choices that were in alignment with allowing our ‘ohana to harmonize to our new dynamic, allow us bonding time, creating slow mornings and days at home. Not rushing back into an “urgency culture” was key for my mental health and that of our ‘ohana. We made a commitment early in the postpartum season that we would get out to the beach for sunset. This can feel challenging when you’re living on “newborn central time zone” and days and nights are blending. I was not yet cleared for submerged ocean time, but those are some of my most cherished memories. Listening to the soundtrack of little voices and giggles as JD, Camden and Cruz charged waves and played in the water are forever etched in my memory. I breastfed Chord on the beach, took my own newborn photo shoots,and regulated my nervous system and hers with the magical contact of Mama and baby. Dipping her toes in the sand and into the Nalu waves felt so fulfilling. The oxytocin (our love hormone!) levels soared with these sunset sessions.
Validating myself, meeting and greeting any emotions I’m feeling as my teachers has been postpartum medicine for my soul. I’ve also had delicious 1-on-1 time with Camden and Cruz through intentionally pouring into the little pockets of the day. The magic of screen free time and speaking their language of play has preserved and elevated my bond individually with each of them. Chord is getting super mobile now so we’re entering the phase of puzzles and artwork and games and forts getting deconstructed quickly, so lots of pivots (and humor) coming my way to navigate it.
I’ve also released limiting beliefs that once held power over me, and it’s been so liberating. For example, I’m a walker now! The power of a good stroll, listening to the soundtrack of nature or my keiki, an uplifting meditation or audiobook has been transformative. I also recently joined our church hula hālau, and this fluidity of movement has felt so reverent. I got to dance in the Mother’s Day Mele and it was profound to dance for the ancestors who have come before us, the Mothers who have paved our paths, and the Mothers surrounding us now.
Manifesting and holding space for other Mamas to lead with their superpower of vulnerability has been so impactful. I’ve been able to cultivate a community around me by choosing to lead with my own vulnerability. We desire and crave connection- to rejoice and grieve with one another. Letting others into my inner world is something that hasn’t always come super natural to me, and I know now it is part of my core mission to create this space for myself and other Mamas.
As Mamas, we can often become entangled in shame and guilt and “we don’t want to burden anyone” mode. This doesn’t serve us, or those we want to cultivate connection with. I’ve been there.
I also actively speak life and love over my body daily with aff-FOR-mations. I’m focused on claiming the strength of my Divine Feminine. The way my body has shown up for me, nourished 3 humans, and continues to nurture and provide for them is truly magnificent. I’m actively releasing the societal narrative of “getting my body back”. I’m moving forward with momentum, which I like to call Mamamentum! I believe it is our birthright to prosper.
Mama Mindset® is a space I created to empower and ignite the Healer within each Mama in her prenatal and postpartum periods.
You can connect with me on social media: @dranikcockroft
Some of my favorite Coco Moon products:
All 3 of my babies have arrived earthside and into swaddled Coco Moon Aloha. Swaddles remain one of my favorite products because of their versatility! They function in the newborn period for savory snuggles, they’re fun to roll up and have at the ready in my diaper bag, I tie them over my shoulder for nursing covers, they can be beach pareos, they have made appearances in imaginary play as capes, and they are comfortable blankies/lovies of choice for our keiki.
Camden has newborn photos with “Pot ‘O Aloha” which remains a core favorite print, Cruz has them with “Nalu” and Chord has the benefit of receiving all that came before her, although the “Hibiscus Honey” was a favorite in her newborn period. I also have the Mama Robe, and it made me smile to match her.
We also love the hooded towels and bathrobes- we have ‘Ohana matching “Nalu” robes, and baby Chord has the “Nalu” hooded towel for the waves that inspired her middle name. The first piece I ever got to write for Coco Moon was about “Bathing The Little Moons Of Your Life”, and we have treasured bathtime and bonding since we started our journey into parenthood.
The bamboo PJs are a favorite to bask in for bedtime, and to Island Hop in comfy coordinated style! Our nights are currently flavored with Rainbow Shave Ice matching pajamas. We also love the Surf Report and celebrating beaches we’ve surfed around Hawai’i. Our matching game is strong with Camden + Chord with Tutu’s Garden and Cruz + Chord with 808 Grindz. Can you tell I’ve had fun over the years with these prints that celebrate Hawai’i and add vibrancy to our lives?! Camden has long adored her “spinny” bamboo dresses and has the “Hibiscus Kiss” and “Plumeria” ready to hand-me- down to Chord. We also love the reverence infused into the Maui Strong Print and have the dresses and a polo shirt for Cruzy boy.
Please stay tuned for my upcoming children’s book to honor and benefit the nonlinear healing path forward for Lāhainā. It is my intention that it invites you to engage with your keiki in an age-appropriate way around the tragedy that occurred, and be a part of the commUNITY moving into the future.
Underwater Photo Credit: Tracy Leboe